1k and a good deed a day

Was what came between me and a sub 2h half marathon...  Pissed off doesn't even cover it!  Plus, to make matters worse, whoever had been in before me had left a present. Yep.  So, I spent precious seconds trying to flush it away so the next person in the queue wouldn't think it was mine.  I was only on the first lap, but obviously hydrated a little too much before my half marathon.  Well, that, or the wine from last night was trying to make a quick exit.  Dispite that, Strava gave me this brilliant time:  My official result from @Runthroughuk was 2h.05m.05s Obviously prefer the Strava time, but I need to knock about 6 minutes off my time to comfortably get under 2h.  Ha, better get my little legs moving a lot quicker!  I put some sweets in my running bra to keep me going, not realising how hard it is to eat and run. I chocked on my own spit and remnants of sweet a couple of times, but convinced myself the sugar was hel...

So, after thinking... I never want to run a marathon! Why would anyone want to run a marathon? No one needs to run a marathon really, do they It is just showing off?!  Guess what?! I'm going to run a ruddy marathon!  The half marathon I was going to do in December has accidently changed to a full. I blame a moment of insanity.  After my last half I thought,  well that was pretty easy, I didn't even break a sweat! I can do this marathon malarkey.  But I didn't break a sweat because it was hammering with rain and it was more of a race to get out of my wet clothes than anything else.  That being said, some weird part of my brain decided that I can do the half marathon distance twice...I HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN DRINKING!  So, thanks to that brilliant decision, for the next 8 weeks you will find me pounding the pavements looking like a deer caught in the headlights, with the constant thought of  what the hell did I sign up to a marathon for?!  ...

Mile 1: I’m here, I’m ready, I feel great. Going to smash this in no time! Probably should have trained harder than doing a few 5k’s but I’m sure it will be fine. It is 5k 4 times, plus a little bit - easy. Mile 2: To make sure I get to the end I will try and keep up with someone with a similar pace, I will try to not be too obvious. Mile 3: Someone must have moved the mile 3 marker. The distance from 2-3 miles was much too far, the runner I was copying seems to have disappeared. I will look for a new mark. Mile 4: Over 5k done, quarter of the way there if my maths is correct. Get in! I’m flying through this. Mile 5: So 5 miles is halfway to 10 miles, when I get to 10 miles the end will be in sight. I’m feeling amazing.   I’m going to book a marathon as soon as I have finished! Mile 6: Nearly halfway, I have a new runner I am following, think I am annoying him as he keeps looking back at me and my noisy hydration vest. Mile 7: It is very hard to drink and run. Choked an...